Confidence Is Optional

Confidence often gets talked about like it’s a prerequisite for being able to do something.

“You need confidence.”
“Just be confident.”
“Confidence is everything.”

Sometimes it does beg the question, do you actually need confidence?  Ponder that idea for a second — do you really need it?  

I mean it’s good to have, but it’s not actually necessary.

You only need to be competent.

Confidence helps, but it’s not everything. Your focus at all times should be on competence. Keep working on it. Make that your main focus every day.

Believe it or not, confidence for the most part is just an emotion.

And if there’s anything you should know about emotions, it’s that they come and they go.  They blow like the wind.

Confidence gets built and shattered in a myriad of ways.  That’s why relying on confidence alone can be a fragile strategy.

Competence on the other hand is a tad bit different.

Competence, by definition, is the ability to do something successfully or efficiently. It’s built through practice, repetition, and experience. It doesn’t depend on how you feel that day.

Now to be fair to confidence, it should be noted that confidence is often just proof of concept.

Proof of the competence we’re talking about.

When you’ve done something enough times and you’ve built the skill, confidence tends to follow naturally.

The order matters.  Competence first.  Confidence later.  Or sometimes, not at all.

Developing confidence first, when you don’t have the competence to match is often a recipe for disaster.  I’ll let you imagine what that looks like and how bad it can get.

On the days you don’t feel confident, you should still be able to take solace in your competence.

The work you’ve put in.  The reps you’ve done.  The skill you’ve built.  That alone should be able to carry you through whatever task or job you’re trying to get done.

Focus on improving competence.  More often than not, the confidence will follow.

And if it doesn’t? It’s okay.

It may not even be necessary.